Towards Youth-Centred Planetary Health Education

Round 1

Reviewer 1 Report

This article fits the scope of the journal well. Article sections are thorough, comprehensive and relevent. 

Author Response

No response for this reviewer as they did not provide comments. We appreciate their review and feedback. 

 

Reviewer 2 Report

This paper is a report of the data and an analysis of the results of the Planetary Health Film Lab at York University in Toronto, particularly of the first of three years of the PHFL operation. The paper is generally well-written although at times the authors use terms that are not defined in the text. As well, the ordering of the data and analysis currently does not follow the order of the films presented through the link provided, making it difficult to compare the two easily.

 

The analysis that has been provided has been categorized into three areas: Anthropogenic footprints, Ecological and climate justice, and Collective local/global solutions. These seem reasonable distinctions. However, it is unclear how these distinct categories are to be used to suggest change to decision-making bodies. In what way do these categories help to make change either more likely or to take place more quickly? This is not addressed by the authors.

 

As no details have been provided with respect to the entrance and exit surveys, this aspect of the study is unavailable and needs to be rectified.

 

There is some sloppiness in the presentation of the paper. Although the Challenges template has been used, the Abstract has been treated as the first paragraph of the paper rather than part of the front matter. As well, the keywords have been left off. The authors have a habit of treating long quotations as if they are a new paragraph of the text itself, making it very difficult to determine if the information is a quotation or not. It is also problematic that the citations and references have been formatted incorrectly. According to the template for MDPI journals, all citations are to be normal sized text in square brackets before punctuation rather than superscript after punctuation. As an example, [1] rather than ¹. The citations will need to be redone to the correct form. Furthermore, so will the style of the references to correspond with MDPI style.

 

Below are line by line suggested edits pointing to the location of specific issues to be resolved.

 

Line by line suggested edits

19 Please remove citation from the Abstract. The Abstract is not part of the body of the paper.

33 Please remove citation from the Abstract. The Abstract is not part of the body of the paper.

35-36 The paper is missing the keywords as part of the MDPI template. Please insert the keywords.

39 In order to insert citation 1 into the body of the paper, change “projects that were” to “projects designed to educate, empower and support young people as they learn about and record planetary health, “the health of human civilisation and the state of the natural systems on which it depends” [1]. These were projects that were”.

41 Change “detail” to “details”.

43 Change “buid” to “build”.

51 Please indicate that Paul Crutzen was the first to define Anthropocene in a peer reviewed journal.

52 Holocene needs to be defined.

55-56 “colonization, industrialized agriculture, mass extraction, urbanization and global warming that alters the atmosphere, oceans and soil. They describe ocean acidification, dead zones and changing biospheres due to habitat loss, predation and species invasions. Human activity is layered into a geological record marked by fossil-fuel extraction, atomic testing, ocean plasticisation and species extinction”—each one of these terms needs to be defined and referenced.

70-73 If this is a quotation, either put it in quotation marks or indent it so that it is set apart from the rest of the text. If instead it is the continuation of line 69, put line 69 and 70 together.

74-75 Please provide references for the claim that the education of youth is historically contested.

90 Please cite Hovland 2014 with a number rather than name and date as per MDPI style and include it in the references.

158 This line ends mid-sentence. Please complete the sentence. Perhaps line 159 represents the continuation of the sentence and the two lines merely have to be put together.

167-168 Change “organizations Interested” to “organizations. Interested”.

177 Please provide information on the second iteration of the PHFL project or explain why this is not available.

181 Change “Partberships” to “Partnerships”.

182 Change “infratstucture, equipement” to “infrastructure, equipment”.

192 Please provide details on the Entrance and Exit surveys.

237-239 Change “We did neither analyze cinematic or technical aspects of films nor engage youth participants in the thematic analysis” to “The cinematic and technical aspects of the films were not analyzed nor were the youth participants engaged in the thematic analysis”.

245 Although the authors have stated in line 166 there have been three iterations of the PHFL, the methods are provided only for the first iteration. The second is not mentioned at all in the entire Methods section while information about the third iteration is only with respect to the Youth Participants subsection. Why were the methods of the two subsequent iterations not mentioned? The reason has to be provided in the text.

247 How did the youth come to know about the project to complete the entrance survey? If there were seven participants (see line 173), why did only six complete the entrance survey? Were all of them students at York University? Please provide this information in the text.  

262 Please move “The number of ‘views’ for each as detailed below is based on YouTube viewer metrics as of October 27, 2022.” to between line 280 and 281.

269-270 Please remove the line break between “the” and “environmental”.

264-280 As these films have been numbered, it would be best if they were ordered as the films are ordered online at the link provided. They are not currently ordered in this way.

343-346 If this is a quotation, either place it between quotation marks or differentiate the statement from the rest of the text.

374-378 If this is a quotation, either place it between quotation marks or differentiate the statement from the rest of the text.

380-382 If this is a quotation, either place it between quotation marks or differentiate the statement from the rest of the text.

411-414 If this is a quotation, either place it between quotation marks or differentiate the statement from the rest of the text.

446-449 If this is a quotation, either place it between quotation marks or differentiate the statement from the rest of the text.

457-463 If this is a quotation, either place it between quotation marks or differentiate the statement from the rest of the text.

468-470 These three questions should be more than rhetorical. The authors should provide explicit answers to these questions based on the result of the PHFL.

492 The authors need to indicate why it is relevant to be in concordance with Susan Sontag.

510 A limitation that was not mentioned is the small number of views each of the films has received. This is particularly a problem if the aim of the films is to affect global change.

511 Please add the heading 5. Conclusions.

530-534 If this is a quotation, either place it between quotation marks or differentiate the statement from the rest of the text.

543-544 Please make this information in plain text rather than bold “The Planetary Health Film Lab (2020) was funded in part by the Social Sciences and 543 Humanities Research Council of Canada (SSHRC). Reference Number: 611-2019-0356”.

References

1 Please reformat this reference so all information is within the left margin.

1, 3-6, 13,15-17, 19, 26, 27, 31, 36,38, 41, 53 For each of these references, all available online, please add the date the article was accessed.

For all journal articles, include the DOI number.

46-52 For the films, include that they are available online and the date they were accessed.

Author Response

Please see the attached. 

Author Response File: Author Response.pdf

Reviewer 3 Report

This manuscript illustrates how to use Planetary Health Film Lab and its sister project the Youth Climate Report to conduct a youth-centred planetary health education. It explains the importance and advantages of youth-centred planetary health education. It uses making films as the method focusing on anthropogenic footprints, ecological and climate justice, and collective local/global solutions. Overall, the authors make a good demonstration of the strength of youth-centred earth health education.

 

Regarding the participation of the seven youth, is their result sufficiently representative and universal for the youth?

 

Although the research target group in this study is the youth, the specific research method of the Planetary Health Education is making films, so the title seems slightly vague.

 

The author does not show very well how to quantitatively analyse these seven films.

 

Line 556, Ref. 1, Alignment.

Author Response

Please see the attached. 

Author Response File: Author Response.pdf

Round 2

Reviewer 2 Report

The authors are thanked for the changes they have made in response to reviewers’ comments. The manuscript has been improved as a result. 

 

As an additional comment, what the authors need to keep in mind when reporting on a study is presenting the details in a way that the study can be replicated by other researchers. The problem remains with this manuscript that there is far too little detail about how the program was done for replication to be possible. Many of the changes suggested below relate to requests for providing additional details about the methods and analysis. 

 

A few other changes are suggested below regarding language and punctuation editing. 

 

Furthermore, the authors need to reformat their submission to correspond to MDPI guidelines with respect to subsection numbering and to the references. Although the authors have added the DOI to the references, the style of referencing they used is not MDPI. As such, all the references need to be redone according to the proper style.

 

Line by line suggested edits.

57 Change “human made” to “human-made”.

70 “mortgaging” is not the best word. Mortgages are obtained to build future equity with the implication that they will be paid back in time according to a schedule. The health of future generations is not part of any schedule for what is going to be paid back. Perhaps “forfeiting” is a better word.

74 Change “mortgaged” to “forfeited”.

87-88 It is understood that the citation of Hovland 2014 is part of the quotation that is being referenced. However, for every citation, there must be a corresponding reference. There is no reference to Hovland 2014 in the list of references. If the authors do not want to include Hovland 2014 as part of their list of references, the suggestion is to change “global citizens (Hovland 2014), practitioners” to “global citizens …, practitioners”.

93 Change “education Zeinali” to “education. Zeinali”.

132 Please state the connection between anticolonial education, youth-centred education  and  planetary health education. The connection is not obvious. It needs to be spelled out. It is not enough to say that it re-animates the work of Paulo Freire. Why should this work be re-animated? This needs to be discussed.

133 Although this statement begins with “Therefore”, it doesn’t follow from the previous paragraphs. Instead, new information is introduced. Delete “Therefore.” Furthermore, please define “democratize knowledge”, as it is a technical term.

134 As “narrative” is a technical term, it needs to be defined in relation to story, art and film. As well, the importance of narrative to this project must be outlined.

151 After “[42]” might be a good place for a statement to indicate how Geo-Doc relates to narrative.

158-162 Please offset this quotation or include quotation marks so that it is obvious it is a quotation.

166 How exactly were the participants recruited? Did all the partner organizations use the same method to recruit the participants? Was this a method developed by the authors?

184-187 When participants were encouraged to tell stories from their communities, how did they come to know of the three central themes? Were these provided by the authors, did the participants look them up themselves by reading reference 44, or was this information provided by the partner organizations?

187 Change “written for separate upcoming publications”  to “written up separately for upcoming publications and will not be discussed here.”

189 Change “time was provided” to “time provided”.

192-197 Change “The process included ongoing correspondence and data collection (brief Entrance that provided a baseline understanding of participants previous knowledge and experience with filmmaking, advocacy, and planetary health, and Exit surveys that demonstrated to what degree the PHFL supported participants in learning about these same topics, which we analyzed qualitatively for this paper) with youth and 196 educators both during and post-completion.” to “The process involved ongoing correspondence with youth and educators and data collection both during and post-completion. This included a brief Entrance survey that provided a baseline understanding of participants previous knowledge and experience with filmmaking, advocacy, and planetary health, as well as qualitative Exit surveys that demonstrated to what degree the PHFL supported participants in learning about these same topics.”

194 What were the designs of the Entrance and Exit surveys? Who conducted these surveys? Who did the analysis of the surveys? Where is a summary of the findings from these surveys?

211-223 Who were the faculty members involved in each of the different workshops and meetings?

215 How did the participants organize these interviews with scholars and experts? Did the faculty involved help the participants locate these scholars and experts or did the participants have to do this on their own?

224-231 How did participants know in what way to post their resulting films to the YCR? How were the participants contacted to screen and speak about their films?

233-250 The point of describing the methods and analysis is to permit the study to be replicated by other researchers. There is far too little information provided about the surveys, the interview and the analysis of the youth made films in order to replication to be possible. Please provided the type of details that researchers would need to know to replicate these findings.

252 Please number this 3.1. Youth and their Films, as per MDPI guidelines.

253 If the entrance survey was important to the project, why was this not a requirement for participation in the study? Did the lack of participation by one of the youth affect the study? If so, how it this affect the study?

253-264 Before these answers are provided, readers need to know the questions that were asked to elicit these responses. Please provide the survey questions.

288-322 Please be sure to update the number of views  for each film or to indicate the date the views were noted.

301  It would be informative to note why the authors think that The Paradise I Call Home by Kai Millen with 713 views has had so many more views than the other films.

323 Please number this 3.2. Themes, as per MDPI guidelines.

329 Please number this 3.2.1. Anthropogenic footprints, as per MDPI guidelines.

333-334 “48 million animals are killed in wild-fires” as well as the decline of coral reefs.” There are an odd number of quotation marks here. Either delete one or add another.

363 Please number this 3.2.2. Ecological and climate justice, as per MDPI guidelines.

400 Please number this 3.2.3. Collective local/global solutions, as per MDPI guidelines.

412 Some information about where the participants stayed on campus, how close their rooms were, the amenities they had and how often then took trips together in the city would be helpful for researchers wanting to replicate this study.

429 Given that the University where the project is located is in a city, did the participants get out into nature during their stay in Toronto? Please say something about the connection that participants had to nature while living in the city in the program.

442 Change “as stated” to “, as stated”.

459 Change “as stated” to “, as stated”.

467-468 “It is not enough to simply modify and update content (i.e., what to teach) if we are to transform planetary health education.”—who has said it is enough? Please provide a reference.

559 Delete “(see attached)”.

References

The references need to be redone in MDPI style. Please check the style sheet before making changes to each reference.

Author Response

Good day, 

Thank you again for your thorough review of our paper. We have responded to each of your comments and the attached manuscript currently includes track changes for ease of your review. If you would prefer that we send you a final version with no track changes, do let me know and I will update the manuscript and resubmit. 

Again, we really appreciate your attention to detail. Your feedback has strengthened our paper. 

Kind regards, 
Deborah

Round 3

Reviewer 2 Report

The authors are thanked for their improvements. This is now a fully reproducible study.

 

Substantially, the manuscript is ready for publication. However, with respect to details, there are still corrections to be made. 

 

Although the authors intended to switch their numbering system to that of MDPI, they did so only partially. Below, in the line by line suggested edits, are each of the instances where the titles will have to be changed to correspond to MDPI requirements. What isn’t stated below in the line by line edits but must also be followed is there should be no punctuation after the words of the titles of sections, subsections and subsubsections. This means the “:” or “.” should be eliminated from these.

 

Making these changes, plus a few other little corrections to punctuations and creating paragraphs in the remainder of the document, will be mean that the review process is complete and the manuscript is ready for publication. 

 

Line by line suggested edits

36-48 Please switch the style of the paragraph formatting to full justification.

53 As per MDPI guidelines, please renumber your “1.2 A Transdisciplinary Context” to “1.1. A Transdisciplinary Context”. As well, this is a heading, so it needs to be on a separate line with a line space before the title. Please see the instructions for authors. You may also download another word template for Challenges. The instructions are provided as part of the template.

54 It would be better if the authors change “reckoning with” to “consideration of”.

87 Change “…,,” to “…,”.

108 Put a line space before this line, make it a title and renumber “1.3 Youth-Centred Education” to “1.2. Youth-Centred Education”.

147 Put a line space before this line, make it a title and renumber “1.4 Youth Climate Report and Planetary Health Film Lab:” to “1.3. Youth Climate Report and Planetary Health Film Lab”.

161-162 There shouldn’t be a new paragraph and “Video” should not be capitalized.

168 Put a line space before this line and make it a title on a separate line. Then, include a period to change “2.1” to “2.1.”.

178 Create new paragraph after “consideration”.

189 Create a new paragraph after [46] and change “[46]” to “[46].”

200 Put a line space before this line and make it a title on a separate line. Then, include a period to change “2.2” to “2.2.”.

240 Change “assist” to “assisted”.

245 Change “5:00 pm” to “5:00 p.m.”.

261 Put a line space before this line and make it a title on a separate line. Then, include a period to change “2.3” to “2.3.”.

286 Put a line space before this line and make it a title on a separate line. Then, include a period to change “3.1” to “3.1.”.

359 Change “whos” to “whose”.

364 Put a line space before this line and make it a title on a separate line. Then, include a period to change “3.2” to “3.2.”.

371 Put a line space before this line and make it a title on a separate line. As this is a subsubsection, it should not be italicized (see the instruction for authors). Then, include a period to change “3.2.1)” to “3.2.1.”.

404 Put a line space before this line and make it a title on a separate line. As this is a subsubsection, it should not be italicized (see the instruction for authors). Then, include a period to change “3.2.2)” to “3.2.2.”.

441 Put a line space before this line and make it a title on a separate line. As this is a subsubsection, it should not be italicized (see the instruction for authors). Then, include a period to change “3.2.3)” to “3.2.3.”.

552 Put a line space before this line and make it a title on a separate line. Then, include a period to change “4.1” to “4.1.”.

568 Put a line space before “5. Conclusions”.

Author Response

Good day, 

Thank you again for your thorough and thoughtful review of our work. We are so pleased with it now in its final form for publication. 

We have implemented each of your edits using track changes. 

Kind regards, 

Deborah